(From the Table is a series of conversational articles which have been birthed from the weeks treatments with Jacquie McIntyre- showcasing some interesting concepts and issues that both people and animals alike face in their journey to body and mind health and
deep happiness. (all names have been changed))
This series of From the Table was inspired by a Facebook post that they deleted from my business page.
Re-assessing my relationships...just one in particular, and some practical tools so you can too.
Did you ever have the experience has a child where you wrote pages of work only to take it to your teacher and she crosses out entire paragraphs telling you that it's no good, or that it's not acceptable.. that you'll have to redo the whole lot again?
I did and only just remembered it recently, because I was triggered by something Facebook did. Facebook removed a recent post from my business page that I had shared, it was a great article some lady wrote about a simple yet powerful technique, that resonated with me because it had come up as a priority so many times over the years in peoples sessions, and it was worthy of the share. Someone messaged me and said “Hey Jacquie where has that post about xxx gone?” which lead me to discover that it has been deleted.
Now I don’t spend a lot of time on Facebook, I have a business to run, clinic to be in and a family and self to nurture…. I'm very careful about what I share, I have a general rule that it needs to add some type of value to your life or I won't share it, so I take my time and put a lot of thought into it. That was part of my trigger...I was like “Aww man, I put a lot of thought into sharing that post”. It felt like the Facebook school teacher came through and as she deleted it, said “nope, not good enough Jacquie” and crossed it all out.
It has allowed me to re-assess my relationship with Facebook, which is kinda cool timing for a few reasons. Recently in the My Incredible Orbit Village we have gone through a series of 3 group sessions that focused on a particular theme. They looked at taking what a person can potentially learn from any experience and giving it a construct of being like a stocktake system.
Additionally we looked at relationships and partnerships of all kinds (past and present)...How do you want to be in them? What purpose do they serve? Are they positive and nurturing?, how do you serve and support them? and one of the biggest one’s... How can you be in a matrix (relationship/ group/ partnership or otherwise) and not lose sight of yourself?. How can you still turn up authentically and truthfully whilst not getting ‘sucked into’ the ideals and beliefs that the other matrix can hold.
You see, a lot of people will have an experience with someone or something that impacts them in some way and not be wired or have the knowledge about the necessity of doing an internal debriefing and running what I call a stocktake process.
When you do a stocktake from an ‘experience of some kind’ it enables light to shine into areas that you would not have been able to see otherwise. Without it, it can leave you in a place of feeling powerless, sad, confused, abandoned, angry, isolated and rejected for days, weeks months and for many people it will carry into years and years.
A stocktake means that your able to ask yourself a few questions (I’m listing a few below that I personally use, to start you off).
The answers and clarity that come from your stocktake is then your Power and Wisdom in moving forward with Life. And this is where you will get enormous growth from. You as a sentient being will find the opportunity for growth to be exponential...it’s a game changer when you self enquire like this.
The more you do it, the easier it gets and the shorter the ‘stocktake’ period which means the faster you shift and make changes from a stressful or traumatic experience into a place of clarity, power, learnt knowledge and wisdom.
Now that’s excellent!.
It will help you enormously to make very different decisions in the future about events, activities, people and things that you would not have had you not done your personal stocktake.
So what did I end up doing about the post that Facebook deleted from my page you might ask?
~ I decided to write my own. The reason I shared it is because it is information that very often comes up in a BodyTalk session and it’s a super valuable, practical thing you can do at home with amazing benefits. I’ll share it with you next week in the next edition of From the Table.
~ As facebook evolves they want business pages to pay money to post things. It’s kinda a blackmail thing that doesn't wash so well with me. It’s the "if you pay me money to ‘boost’ this post I'll make sure the people who have 'Liked' your page get to see it” And that kinda sucks. What we do know is that they are not taking this approach with FB Groups. So your going to see me a lot more in the MIO Group, on Instagram and YouTube. All the links to join me are at the bottom of the page.
~ Which is why I am also extending an open door invitation into the My Incredible Orbit (MIO) Facebook GROUP. The reason why is because we as a village share lot’s about life, ideas, things we have tried, our successes, learning experiences and general great conversations, it’s a safe place to be yourself in a non judgemental space.
Each month I do a live introduction into the group, outlining all the potential concepts that could come up as a priority to be addressed in the next months worth of group sessions before us. You can watch and be part of those Series Intros as much as you like, it often ignites great ideas and conversation, I would love to have to part of that.
The following are questions I often ask myself when I have had a challenging/ triggering or upsetting experience.
Firstly I ask myself what emotions am I feeling and where am I experiencing them in my body, this helps me to get in touch with what is going on more deeply.
I imagine myself in the conflict! (eyes closed)...then in my imagination I take one or two big steps backwards out of that circle of conflict. You can do this physically as well if it helps. This enables you to seperate yourself from the conflict/trigger and be the observer. Just from this perspective alone you can gain greater awareness and clarity that changes the way your feeling and thinking right then!
I ask myself, "is this something that I will need to personally address with someone or if it's something I will just let go of?". Sometimes when I ask myself this question I realise that this will be something that becomes clear to me after I work through my ‘stocktake’ process, so I just put it on hold and wait.
To use this experience as an example I recognise that I do not want to take this matter further personally with Facebook I recognised that Facebook was the trigger of something deeper within me.
What does this really relate too? Most of the time it actually traces back to something that has happened in your life or a time period where things were not great. Remember from this perspective your just watching it from outside the circle of conflict...not in it. When your in it, you won't be able to see cleary and have other perspectives.
Either way recognising that if this trigger has come up, it means that you have not worked through these issues and events from your past. If you had, it would not impact you the way it does and you would in fact, feel very neutral to it really not caring at all. It simply would be a non event that you can move through easily.
Understanding that the larger issue tracks back to something from your past enables you to be able to defuse the current tension and seperate yourself from it. You can take the blame off the thing/ person that you were placing it on.
Ask yourself, “From all the times in my life that this same kind of thing has happened, what do I need to see and know from it , so I can take that information forward with me as wisdom and apply it?" Either observe it as it comes up or write it down. (I would not be inclined to keep it afterwards if you do write it down- burn it perhaps)
Then ask yourself “Is there something that I can do about this that is productive and proactive right now?”
You have three options available to you now that can be really empowering.
SIT- You have the choice to sit stagnant and do nothing. Know though that when you do this, nothing changes. The trigger is still there and the conflict can arise again, which is often the case.
BACK- you can move away from the conflict choosing to let it go, not doing anything about it at all. Sometimes this can be a very liberating thing, it encourages the ability to be able to let go and practice non-attachment and then at times it will be a priority to do something about it to gain the knowledge so it becomes wisdom before moving on. Your gut feelings (Enteric Brain) are always the right way to go on this.
FORWARD- move towards the issue and do something about it. Chose to do things that are positive and empowering that bring balance to your life and nurture your soul. You must advocate for yourself in a loving and proactive way in order to have the best relationship with yourself and your life. The bonus is that this then usually resolves the conflict and prevents it arising again because you have taken practical steps. And changes your future relationships to become a healthy representation of what you deserve.
Try them and let me know how it goes for you. If you have any questions, pop on over to the MIO group and ask away. I’m always hanging out there ready to join you in conversation.
Now don't forget to jump on over and share in the fun of the My Incredible Orbit Facebook group too. And in next week's edition of From the Table I’m going to share my version of the article that FB deleted, which I’m so looking forward to.
MIO Facebook Group- https://www.facebook.com/infojacquiemcintyre/
Knowledge sharer, wisdom bringer, light shiner and fierce supporter of you and your animals. Through private treatment sessions, seminars and workshops based in integrated consciousness healthcare, getting you the powerful results you so deeply desire. Jacquie advocates for peoples potential, she shares her knowledge in all things healthcare, consciousness and business whilst inspiring people to be the most exceptional version of themselves that they can possibly be.
Consciousness based Healthcare, where you and your Animals are the Priority