(From the Table is a series of conversational articles which have been birthed from the weeks treatments with Jacquie McIntyre- showcasing some interesting concepts and issues that both people and animals alike face in their journey to body and mind health and deep happiness. (all names have been changed))
My Dad often says, “smell the roses starey”, (my nickname since I was a young whipper snapper) and in our house we often say it when we are mimicking him whilst playing around.
It locks in deeper each time. Don’t just be grateful... live the expression of gratitude and 'smell the roses'.
I notice at this time every year I’m facilitating sessions for people who are burnt out but trying to go hard and go fast at the start of a new year.
How do you think the year goes for these people, starting something dog tired and in a body that is in total disharmony?
So a lot of the sessions I facilitate are not just about deeply repairing the body but reformatting the mind and the person to pace itself, treat itself like the most precious commodity on this planet and produce quality over quantity in everything they do. I’ll explain a bit more down the page.
A year is a long distance race in case you had forgotten, what are you doing starting out so darn fast?
Oh my llama! (my new saying that drives my kids bonkers...goal achieved ;-)
Have you ever seen those people in a race that start out going so fast, they want to get out to the lead...be in the front…..but they don’t have the distance, they start to loose pace and before you know it they finish at the back of the pack in cramps, in a world of pain and racked with disappointment and self loathing. A lot of the time, they didn’t think about the whole picture, they were solely focused on getting out to the lead.
Maybe your goal just for this year can be taking your awareness and pace to being Macro from the Micro?
One of the things I will be doing every monday morning after my gym and swim, is coming to this vibing coffee house and writing magic to all of you.
It gets me out of the office, I see other human beings who are not just on my client schedule or a business associate lol...and I get to care for myself while I’m planning courses and writing...two things I absolutely love doing.
So, what are some of the reasons of why this happens to people?
There are literally tens of thousands but here are a few common ones.
It’s partly the energy that this time of year brings...it’s January and many people have set goals, have a vision of what they want the year and the end of the year to look like, and they have this deep patterning that if they do everything now and go hard that it somehow is going to amount to goals being reached and abundance of bliss and riches.
There are 12 Houses we will work our way through, over the next 12 months...(each house relates to the cycles you move through throughout life, the different stages of development and the impact that the experiences you have had in each of those houses has had on your life)
So this time of year also relates to the First House and in the My Incredible Orbit Village we have just completed a powerful series of three sessions that looked at how the first few precious years of life shapes you and your behaviours.
You see your just a little sponge at that age and your environment and the people in it are your constant teachers.
If the people around you taught you and you constantly heard “do better”, “be better”, “get it right”, “can't you do better than that”,...if you were told “NO” alot or told that you were a “bad girl/boy” then you will have embedded very deeply in the subconsciousness that your not good enough, in fact you could forever be chasing this, trying to be just “good enough” and never achieving it. The elusive, looking for my happiness. That’s what most people start out the year doing...chasing happiness.
And if with all of this it was accompanied with a punishment or physical pain such as a smack, then it imprints within the head Brain memory centres as a pain memory. Pain memories will forever be trying to correct and balance themselves, hence the go hard and go fast mentality or trying to chase excellence and happiness moments can surface.
Majority of people I work with don’t believe they are “good enough”. So if you have the ability to fortify someone today and lift them up by letting them know how brilliant they are….do that.
Those first few years are also a time of learning instant gratification, so if you were not taught to have a healthy relationship with all things pleasurable and not so pleasurable, then you will have a tendency to seek things that bring you pleasure right now, and want things to happen hard and fast to bring results of now pleasure.
Come on...we don’t have to do this anymore, we can recondition to believe and experience a year of self paced, consistent energy and modulated output, that gives you a very Ho Ho Ho end of year experience.
Don’t get sucked into all that media out there that subconsciously tells you how much of a failure you are if you don’t go hard and go fast. I'm pretty sick of the "Have you finished mapping out your entire life by January?" emails I've got for far this year, it's intense...please! It just screams pressure.
You have permission to call “baloney” on that and show them the damaging evidence that shows clearly the war it ignites within the entire bodymind complex when you do this very thing and end up slipping into adrenal fatigue, blowing out all your systems and needing six months off work to recover, or when you realise that you're living someone else's vision of who you are meant to be. It's safer to pace yourself, trust me.
See the size of this Mango, it’s the biggest one I have ever seen and this tiny tree (below) at our house...produced it. I stood in awe when I saw it, and realised that the intention of this tree was to produce Quality over Quantity.
Yes, it could have tried to produce 10-20 smaller mangos, but it knows that, it's in drought so most of them would have fallen off because there was not enough water to keep them hydrated, and it would have weakened the immune system of the tree, becoming susceptible to pathogen attack.
I love how it knows innately that it’s better to pull in your resources, pace yourself and produce one big beautiful mango and its purpose is achieved.
Lesson...Become the mango tree.
So how can you pace yourself and come out smelling like roses?
Get your team of healthcare professionals and support people around you, make it a priority. (I have several BodyTalk practitioners I work with, a massage therapist, a naturopath, a (GP) General Practitioner, Integrated General Practitioner who is also trained in TCM and a few other modalities. A psychologist and several medical specialists like a gynecologist and endocrinologist etc.
I may not see them all or need them all over a year but I have my team, Im super happy with them and they are there if I need them. Who is on yours?
Schedule your healthcare appointments ahead of time, and book them again before you leave, like BodyTalk or massage. None of this... after several weeks of not feeling ok, waking up and “Oh no, I feel like crap, I might ask my therapist for an appointment right now this morning”...and fully expect that it will just be available for you.
This is more important that you think. It says…”I care about myself enough that I’m scheduling my time and locking it in”. It means that you're committed to yourself and your healing journey. It’s also a thing that I look at in clients, it tells me a lot about their relationship with themself.
Set goals but don’t be life or death attached to them working out. Stuff happens, so leave them open to change. Think about having some fun and building a Top 100 goals list...see how many you can tick off this year. (I have attached a free downloadable copy if you want to use the one I use) Pace yourself for a long distance race, not a sprint. Download list
Develop clear and healthy boundaries around your time, emotions, relationships and in business if you have one. Have BodyTalk Sessions if you feel that you don’t have this.
Top tip... Having healthy boundaries does not look like a defensive Chiwawa gnawing someone's head off if they ask you to do something and you don't think it's best for you. It's knowing what's right for you in any given moment and comfortably following that from a place of being neutral, peaceful and loving.
Schedule in movement and pleasure time each day. It can be anything from going for a swim, a walk, or dancing naked in your living room for half an hour...just move that's pretty much what the body is always asking for.
I have this time blocked out in my calendar everyday and nothing can book in over the top of it. From 8:30am to 10am I am in the pool, or gym, yoga etc.
Spend time exploring different forms of Meditation. Guided ones can be really great especially if you new to the concept and they are easy to find online. The change in positive chemical balances within the brain alone is astonishing. If you only did it for this reason it would be worth it.
Grab an art journal and use it to jot things down, paint, draw, stick things in. It can serve any purpose that suits you but it’s all about giving your thoughts, feelings, ideas, hopes and goals a platform. (It's so important I’m going to do a short course on this in 2018)
Strive for quality over quantity when it comes to your tasks and your commitments that you schedule. The more you focus on producing things that your super happy with, rather than trying to rush through you day, week, month and year, the more effective your body will work. The more feeling and focused on 'producing quality'- oriented it will become and the easier you're going to find life in general.
Celebrate your successes...generally people don't do this enough. Or they do a shout out, saying how stocked they are about something they have just accomplished and then what follows is a big BUT.
Like...."I'm so proud of myself, I got a massive project completed today but it could have been better.
BUT"S cancel out everything before that. Your basically cancelling your greatness. Nope! not anymore. Get comfortable with just telling it plain and simple. "I rocked it today and I am so proud of myself".
Till next time,
Pace yourself and don’t forget to wish upon a StaR
Next month in the My Incredible Orbit Village for our series of three sessions, we move onto looking at concepts of “My Emotional Masks” and all concepts that relate to the Second House.
It’s going to be wonderful and I’m so excited.
Have you had a chance to look over the details I'm focusing on in the sessions, if not here they are...it's a brief snapshot into the issues we are facing?
"At a very young age you started to build some very specific behaviours and ways of being. They formed out of need for love and affection. They become your recipe for life, and shape your beliefs about self-worth, self-esteem and security.It is here that we will be looking at the masks that you accumulated when young and repairing or removing the ones you no longer need."
I know some of you are not in our village...that’s ok, it’s not for everyone. It takes an element of commitment and a deep want to show up for yourself and be your own biggest champion. Everyone is at their own phase in life and if it is ever going to be right for you...you will be called innately.
A person can join My Incredible Orbit at any time and if you would like to just wet your toes, did you know that you can join for just one series of powerful and life changing sessions?
It gives you access to be part of these sessions live and if you can’t make it, the video recordings are always emailed out. You get to join our supportive MIO private Facebook group and it includes a chance to be with me live online while I do a Live introductory delve into the series prior to us kicking off and to answer any questions people have. We always round off a series with a live debrief in the group to explore anything that came up and is burning for people.
And of course for those people who join for the whole year you get instant access to over $10,100 worth of sessions, courses, videos and goodies to download.